Trial and Error
by Sakiihana
Summary: In Dead oblivion castle, where dead orgy 13 members go to live, in a dead manner, Larxy is bored out of her mind... so she has decided to bug Axel for fun ,cough-like a child with a crush-cough, A Larxel crack collab with sunwindandwaves.
1. Prologue and Attempt One – Manliness

**Prologue**

The story that will now be told is set in the faraway place of Dead Anime Universe. It is the place where dead anime characters go and live (but not really because they're dead). We will focus on a certain place called Dead Castle Oblivion where dead Organization VIII members happen to live (in a dead manner). And in this castle we will tell of a story about Larxene and Axel.

Now Dead Anime Universe is a pretty boring place. All the exciting stuff happens in the actual anime which one wouldn't be a part in because one is already dead, unless, of course, you pay for a flashback, but that's getting into a whole other story. Anyway, Larxene was pretty bored with the whole dead life until Axel died. She thought that this was the perfect chance to have some fun. "I wonder if I could tease him enough to make him angry," Larxene thought, "Hmmm, let's find out." And thus begins the epic tale of Larxene's attempts to make Axel angry.

* * *

**Attempt One – Manliness**

Axel was lounging about on the sofa in the Dead Castle Oblivion's TV room. His feet were propped up on the table and he was reading "How to Prevent Fangirl Attacks" in Dead Anime People magazine.

As Axel was enjoying the peace and quiet that comes with being dead Larxene suddenly barged in.

"Hey, Turdface!"

Axel looks up to see Larxene with a "I've-come-here-to-torture-you-for-my-amusement" face.

"What is it Larxene? I don't need you bugging me to death, especially when I'm already dead."

Larxene rolled her eyes, "Was that supposed to be a joke? 'cause that was one suckass joke."

"Yeah, Whatever."

Axel puts his magazine down, making sure to cover the title so Larxene couldn't see it.

"What the hell are you doing here anyway?"

Laxene comes over and plops herself on the couch next to Axel, "I just need to ask you a question."

"No. Whatever you what me to do, I'm not doing it."

"Jeez you're such a craphead, I'm not asking you to do anything. Are you still upset about that other time? You should just let it go y'know. I didn't really mean for your room to be destroyed and all your stuff to be completely decimated. It was an accident, I swear."

Larxene gave Axel her innocent look which horrified years off his dead life.

Axel turned his head away, "Ughh, just ask me the question and leave already."

Larxene smiles, "Okay, jeez, It's just that I have this bet with Zexion. It's about those marks under your eyes. Zexion says they're tattoos, but I disagree," Laxene's smile widens, "I think its makeup. So which is it? Huh?"

Larxene leans in closer, looking at axel's annoyed face. She's almost about to laugh and ready for an angry retort back.

A pause,

then Axel finally replies,

"War Paint."

Larxene pauses, "Excuse me?"

"I said it's war paint. Y'know, to show off my manliness."

An akward pause ensues.

Larxene repeats slowly, "War paint… show… manliness…"

Another Pause O.o

Not being able to take it anymore, Larxene runs out of the room and shuts the door to fall to the floor laughing.

Attempt one is a failure.

* * *

**Author's Note:**

Attempt two will be written by none other than sunwindandwaves who can be found in my fav author list.

It really is war paint, go here for proof: h t t p : / / w w w . o l d - p i c t u r e . c o m / i n d i a n s / I n d i a n - w i t h - W a r - P a i n t . h t m (don't include spaces)

See how many that is? Axel must reach the pinnacle of maliness, thus he will become a brave warrior and don the warrior paint off triumph

**Edit**

Well, looking back, this really wasn't all that great, but I promise the next one is better, if by better you mean even more cractastic with some mind scarage included...


	2. Attempt Three – Temperature

* * *

**Attempt Three - Temperature**

Larxene was storming around Dead Castle Oblivion with a very nasty look on her face. Why was that? For the simple reason that Axel had a more feminine body than her, which I daresay would put any girl in a bad mood. Oh, but in a spark of inspiration, Larxene's head perked up and with a deliciously evil smile on her face, for what better way to get revenge and get that red dickweed mad, then to mess up his stuff. Or better yet, steal those sneakily taken pictures of Roxas in the shower that Larxene knew Axel hid in his room somewhere. So off Larxene went, to make Axel's afterlife hell.

As she neared Axel's room, Larxene started to walk quietly and slowly just in case Axel was in his room. To her surprise, Larxene heard music floating from the room and… Axel singing? Curious, Larxene pushed the door open a crack to see what was going on. What she opened the door to see was Axel standing in front of his mirror, with one of his many hairbrushes in his right hand and naked except for a pair of flame patterned boxers with the words **GET THIS MEMORIZED **across the butt in big black lettering. And Boy, did she get that memorized.

But that was just the beginning of the horror as Axel started to sing into his brush, wiggling his feminine hips at the mirror,

**Well woman the way the time cold I wanna be keepin' you warm**

Axel started to shimmy his entire body and made balls of fire appear around him,

**I got the right temperature for shelter you from the storm**

The balls of fire started to spin and Axel winked at himself in the mirror,

**Oh lord, gal I got the right tactics to turn you on, and girl I...**

He wiggled his eyebrows and pointed at himself ,

**Wanna be the Papa...**

Axel twirled and pointed at the mirror,

**You can be the Mom...**

The balls of flame exploded,

**oh oh!**

Axel froze and looked closely at the mirror. To his horror Larxene was standing in the doorway staring at him, the door swung open by the wind. He turned around to face Larxene, ready for the worst. But she just stood there, for Larxene was battling with a confusing array of emotions, that ranged from shock, horror, scarage, laughter, to a great desire to get a piece of that nice ass.

So, with no way to process these emotions Larxene fled the scene, running the hell away from that half-naked tone-deaf sexy red dickweed.

Attempt three: faliure

* * *

**Author's Note: **

Welly well then, I finally added another chapter and holy god is this chock full of crack... For those who don't know, the song Axel was singing was Temperature by Sean Paul. Aw, man looks like Larxene saw Axel in his underwear before me... oh well.

How will Larxene react to these turn of events? Will she continue to tease Axel or will she succumb to the temptation of that nice ass?? Find out in the next chapter that will be written by sunwindandwaves!!


	3. Attempt Four The Discovery

**Attempt Four: The Discovery**

Larxene stealthily sneaked down the hallway toward Axel's room. This time Larxene made sure that the asstard was not in his room. Holy crap did she not want to witness another traumatizing scene… oh god, she shivered at the memory…

Anyway, Larxene pushed open the door and sneaked into the room. A grin spread across her face as she asked herself, "What should I do now? What diabolical scheme should I act on?" Originally the plan was to mess up Axel's room, but considering the piles of crap everywhere, he didn't need her help.

Hmm…might as well see if he has anything worth value to steal, Larxene thought as she paced through the room opening drawers. The first drawer she opened contained a bunch of the same black pants, the second had shirts, the third had…boxers…uh… she closed that one quickly. Moving on, Larxene opened the next drawer to find massive amounts of gel, mousse, and hairspray. Wowzers, the next contained even more hair products plus a selection of brushes and combs. And the next, dear god, included a wide variety of eyeliner, mascara, and Warpaint™ (Maybelline: Manly Makeup®).

Larxene picked up one of the hair gel tubes (Pantene Hair Cement™: Extra firm, Extra Long®), "Woah, this stuff looks good," she fingered her own gravity defying hair, "maybe I'll take some..." and she gathered some bottles and tubes of hair products, one of those fine combs, and some extra-volume mascara (she was running out) in her hand and pockets.

"Quite the productive excursion if I do say so myself," Larxene smiled. She started to walk toward the door but tripped over an issue of the Dead Anime People magazine (Issue 69: Aerith and Zack's afterlife reunion, is that a baby bump showing?! Also includes "50 new fashions for the deceased" and "Flashbacks: Awesome or Overated?").

Larxene frantically reached out with her free hand to stop her fall, she grabbed onto a figurine of Roxas on a shelf and was able to steady herself. Suddenly the Roxas figurine sank down into the shelf and there was a deep rumbling noise. Larxene looked to her left to see the wall parting away to show a door.

WTF? Larxene inched toward the door and cautiously turned the knob. "Crash! Thump! thump, roll…" Larxene dropped the products she held in her hand, along with her entire lower jaw. For what she had found was unmistakably Axel's shrine dedicated to his Roxas. Giant pictures of roxas lined the walls of the room, Roxas sitting under a tree, standing on a cliff, in fighting mode, in a maid outfit (Oo).

In one corner of the room was a shelf of tapes each labeled with a specific date and little side notes like: Roxas eating ice cream, Roxas with his friends, Roxas cooking food, Roxas taking a shower, etc. Opposite of the tape collection was an even larger photo collection. In another corner there was a box of "things" like fuzzy pink handcuffs and the like (no need to go in detail). And pinned all over the walls were ziplock bags with various objects inside and had labels like, Lock of Roxas's hair, Tissue Roxas used, Toilet paper Roxas used, Roxas's underwear, Stick from popsicle that Roxas ate, Roxas's chewed gum, etc.

It was almost too much to take. Larxene was horrified, and yet it was so incredibly funny that she couldn't help but laugh.

Brain Blast!! Larxene thought of a wonderfully perfect idea!! D She went back into Axel's room and dug up a black permanent marker. Then she drew mustaches and glasses on all the pictures of Roxas she could find. She zapped all the tapes and objects until they were burnt black. As for the box of kinky stuff… well, she just left that aside. Larxene closed the secret door and left, with her malicious task completed. (She picked the beauty products back up and took them too).

Later that evening a sudden howling mournful cry echoed through the entire castle…

**Attempt Four: Success?**

**Author's Note:**

Awww, no larxy, how could you mess up Axel's Roxas shrine??

well, here is installment 4!! since jay was too lazy and to DGM obsessed to write another chap, i've taken over this so called collab...yeah, so how will Axel cope with the horror larxy has done??

Find out in the next chapter!!


End file.
